Banker

Last night I was called a wanker...by a banker! Though, to be fair, I’d labelled him a wanker, first.

He had emerged from the stunning Duetsche Bank Place (cool virtual tour) and boarded whilst chatting on the phone, “No, it’s a joke-one moment...Paddington thanks, take William Street...um, I started at six-thirty this morning and now I'm leaving at nine o’clock. This bank’s tearing me a new one but I’m not getting anything like what I’m worth.”

His abject 'poverty' soon became apparent when forced to pay his own cab fare home.

Arriving on William Street he quickly rang off and said, “Mate, just stop here at the ATM. I’ve got to get some dinner.” So I pulled over and stopped in light traffic as there was no parking bays available.

Pointing to my EFTPOS terminal I suggested, “Why don’t we use this, it’s much quicker ?” To my utter surprise he replied, “Nah, I don’t want to pay the surcharge.” Here he referred to Cabcharge’s 10% fee on card transactions, a measly 78¢!

As he didn’t seem to realise that he’d pay more in waiting time by using the ATM, I shrugged, “Well, okay, but the meter’s tickin'...“ By the look of instant disgust which swept over his face you’d think I’d called him a pedophile. He expected me to stop the meter whilst he used the ATM, just to save 78¢ !?

Moreover, the glaring and humiliating irony of a banker resisting legitimate fee charges clearly eluded this cheapskate.

Thus I was forced to explain that waiting-time is a common component of the taxi fare structure and pointed to the rate card on the window in front of him. With that he got out and near slammed the door off the hinges. Nice.

So I elected not to restart the meter whilst he used the ATM, figuring if a buck was that important to him then he was going to earn it.

He sauntered back and handed over a twenty dollar note. “I saved you a buck,” I said and gathered the change. “I don’t give a shit,” he snarled. “Well," I countered, "when you expect a lousy discount from a bloke on ten bucks an hour, then maybe you need to take a look at yourself.” Screw him, I thought.

He leaned down and eyeballed me through the open window, his face contorted with spitefulness. "No," he hissed, “you need to take a look at yourself.” “Why?” I asked handing him the change. “You’re the one carrying on like a wanker.” “No, you’re the wanker!” he barked and turned away.

Banker.

Comments

[Ian]

Ah hahahahaha ya got a live one there, Adrian :-)

What a wanker... and I think that's puttin' it fairly politely... I woulda added a bit more ta that blokes pedigree :-))

[Walter]

The richer some people are the cheaper they are.

[Nashdale]

Gee, I really hope you are the driver called to pick him up when he finishes work againt tonight.
That would be priceless.

[John McCartney]

The guy who told me that tipping was like wipeing your arse.
If you don't do it right it can be very messey when you go back there.

The poorer the guy the better the tip.

[jilske]

hahaha, bwanker!!! irony can be so funny at times, especially when it's eyeballing you in the face ;-)
btw, i love reading your blog adrian, your storystelling skills make me wish i'll be lucky enough one day to call you out of the how many million cabs in sydney - until then, thanks for sharing your stories with us!

[Miles]

What a dick...

I don't know what it's like in Australia, but in studies in the US, on average rich people gave better tips.

I think you just notice it more when someone with plenty of money is incredibly stingy...

Also Adrian, much as I hate tipping and the fact that we're entering a tipping culture, you're a big part of the reason I've started giving even bigger tips to my cabbies of late (unless they're arsehats, which thankfully is reasonably rare). Sucks to be the cabbies who have refused to take me home because it's "not far enough" (even though I'm in St Kilda, where there are ALWAYS more fares for the taking).

[SurferCam]

And he probably got hit with a $1.50 fee at the ATM because it wasn't his bank's ATM...

[Dataceptionist]

You're probably right SurferCam which is hilarious.

As they say though, there's a reason the rich ARE rich

[Grendel]

From this example, being a banker might mean you don't know how to handle small amounts of money.

Being a wanker means you don't know how to interact with people.

Being a wanker and a banker must mean that you've got no hope at all

[la mente torbida]

Collective noun: A wunch of bankers

[Kim]

What a dick. Maybe he got disoriented in the elevator on the way down to catch the cab. I've taken a few travels in the DB building elevators and they scare me - open glass all the way up baby! Eeeek!

[Goldstein]

Superbly told anecdote, Adrian.

As you'd know, this poonce was giving you some text-book "projection" -taking out his emotional discomfort on you -like kicking the dog -and congratulations for being so, ah, reasonable.

He was lucky to not get someone who also has a big store of anger just waiting for an excuse to get loose.. Then his banker problems would be the least of his worries..

[Renanan]

I am in awe... I can't even believe that he would think that exiting the taxi and getting money out at the ATM would cost less?

HUH people!

[Rainer.the.Cabbie]

The last thing I would have done is turn my meter off! Screw them, they are taking your time so they better pay for it! Anyway, the way things are going this fine educated man will be driving a cab very soon except he won't be making any money as professional drivers as yourself will have the better of him. Oh, he'll think it was so much easier writing deeds for sub-prime mortgage's...

[Rainer.the.Cabbie]

I did forget to mention that his Paddo house will be up for auction soon as well...get your money ready as it will be a cheap buy, bloody margin loans he'll think.

[Jon]

"This bank’s tearing me a new one but I’m not getting anything like what I’m worth." If the guy can't figure out that the ATM was not the most cost efficient way to run that, he's probably getting MORE than he's worth. Any respectable banker ought to be able to figure that out instantaneously.

[Shayne]

Amazing how few of these types you get in a Maxi, because they walk past you on a rank or hang back waiting for the Silver or Business Class to get to the front. Getting in a Maxi is sooooooo below their status. If they do get in though, they're generally down to earth types.
If they are forced to take the Maxi however, they find out pretty soon Maxi drivers have shorter fuses (I do anyway), and it might be a very short ride.

[manly cabbie]

silver service what a wank all you get is a taxi with a driver with a tie on.

[Becker]

Rainer.the.Cabbie said
The last thing I would have done is turn my meter off! Screw them, they are taking your time so they better pay for it!

I completely agree Rainer. The meter stays on until they finally leave me in piece. What really makes me laugh thou at the way people carry on is the fact they will argue with me about turning the meter off because they want to get out to use an ATM and cost themselves a $1 yet when they finally give up the waiting time is less expensive than the time they spent arguing about it!